Jennifer Moss

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How to Rethink the Holiday Party - and Avoid Forced Fun

Excerpt from the original article in Fast Company Magazine, by author and speaker Jennifer Moss:

The holidays are fast approaching, and it’s time for the annual office holiday party. However, there is still significant debate about whether a holiday party—essentially forced fun at work—is worth the effort. 

On the one hand, holiday parties can provide an opportunity to celebrate, let loose, and reconnect with colleagues. This is especially important because over the past several years we have been in a workplace friendship recession. According to Gallup, only 3 in 10 workers have a best friend at work. And in an era of remote work when many workers are not getting as much face time, the holiday party can serve as a chance for teams to talk about life instead of work, find common ground, and build friendships.

Having a close ally at work offers significant benefits. Researchers have found that friendship at work increases psychological safety and retention while reducing burnout. It’s also not unusual to engage with work friends outside of work. According to another study, 62% of workers have spent free time with colleagues, 53% have mixed their work and nonwork friends, and 69% met their significant other at work.

On the other hand, we’re still in the midst of economic uncertainty. Many teams have recently experienced layoffs and many workers are feeling burned out. Across the workforce, we’re all still reeling from a polycrisis state, from political upheavals and ongoing wars to natural disasters. I believe leaders need to tread carefully when it comes to hosting full-out holiday parties. There is a real potential that what is inherently well-intended appears tone-deaf.

To address this, leaders should gauge how employees are feeling. Put out feelers by circulating a survey so employees can anonymously share how they’re feeling about celebrating this year. Communicate explicitly that you’re asking for feedback and will respond appropriately. Be explicit that you’ll go with what most employees want—and will support anyone who chooses to forgo the festivities.

Make it clear that opting out of a holiday party is totally fine. Issues arise when having fun with colleagues after work is implied or overtly expected. And during the holidays, the office party can be a key driver of stress and burnout for some employees. Those who self-describe as introverted or shy likely dread year-end party season. “All that socializing is draining for introverts, who often feel overstimulated, even anxious, in large groups,” writes PJ Feinstein. “Shy people, too, may feel anxious at office holiday parties for different reasons; it comes from a place of fear rather than a depletion of energy.”

Holiday parties can also be challenging for people who are neurodivergent. Setting up spaces at your holiday party with invisible disabilities in mind can be a game changer for 20% of your workforce. If your organization has an employee resource group (ERG) that supports people with disabilities, it would be great to get their input beforehand. Maybe they want to be involved in setting up some of those unique spaces.

What I believe teams really need right now is to increase opportunities for serendipitous moments all year long. This helps to take the pressure off the holiday party as the one time each year we have “fun.” As a person who loves a good holiday party, I can attest that there are plenty of us out there who can’t wait to celebrate. But it’s always important to gather feedback and make any event inclusive. Ensure that all team members are set up to enjoy an event. 

PROTECT EMPLOYEE’S PERSONAL TIME

In order to have a successful holiday party, leaders need to respect and protect the personal time of employees. If you give employees the time and resources they need to take care of their personal and professional duties, they will be better equipped to show up to—and enjoy—a holiday party. 

Competing demands sit at the top of employees’ stress lists. Work and home pressures converge during the holidays, and time can seem highly compressed. New right-to-disconnect laws are gaining steam across countries, including Canada, where employees can now sue if their employers try to connect with them after work hours. 

Why wait for a law to practice good, human-centred behaviours? As a manager, plan a review of the workload and see if some project deadlines can be extended. Agree as a team to not reach out after a specific time at night and never on weekends or during vacations. That includes everyone—bosses too. Employees can’t be what they can’t see. Implicit pressures are just as strong as explicit ones.

Plus, the antiquated belief that long hours equal higher productivity has been proven untrue in a series of studies. A Stanford University study by economics professor John Pencavel discovered that productivity per hour declines sharply when a person works more than 50 hours a week. After 45 hours, productivity drops so significantly that there is no value in putting in any more hours. A person who puts in 55 hours per week is just as productive as someone who works 70 hours per week.

Consider what people want right now. The pandemic has reshaped an entirely new global workforce with a vastly different collective attitude toward their social contract with work. Without asking employees about the policies, infrastructure, programming, and the perks they want, good intentions will fall short. At worst, they could exclude, disenfranchise, and be physically and emotionally destructive.

And yet I believe it is crucial that teams make space for fun. Bring back the fun—but tread carefully. No one wants to go back to birthday cake in the break room or downward-facing dog on Zoom. It’s mostly about figuring out what makes work fun for everyone. Even finding just a few minutes to laugh and to see the levity in a heavy world can help bring teams together.

Whatever your team decides to do this holiday season, always prioritize empathetic leadership. You won’t get everything right, but if you take time to actively listen, you’ll show that you want to get it right.

Read the complete original article at the link below: